Art is a Bang!
by Sayu-fu
Summary: The Akatsuki Leader sama gives Deidara a new partner, but does he like her more than he thinks? Yeah, I suck at summaries. HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

**Alright, this is just side tracking myself from my story Ai of the Desert. Well, the main pairing is DeidaXOC, but more might pop up in the future. Or not. Well, lets get this going!**

**Summary: Leader-sama gives Deidara a new partner, and he might like her more than he thinks. DeidaxOC**

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**Name: Kibatsume Kagami**

**Gender: Female**

**Age: 19**

**Marital Status: Single**

**Blood Type: O**

**Hair Color: Blonde**

**Eye Color: Gray**

**Village: Konoha, defected**

**Summary: Young, kekkei-genkai of growing claws and fangs, specializes in genjutsu and taijutsu, has a killing spirit.**

Deidara sighed as he read the description of his new partner. She sounded like a brat, no better than Tobi, but he had to do what Leader-sama wished of him. "I don't know why I need to know if this girl is married or not, yeah."

"I also don't see why we can't just give this partner to Hidan, yeah", he sighed. Ever since Kakuzu died, Hidan needed a partner, so Leader-sama handed Tobi over to him. He could remember the day like it was yesterday. Well, actually, it was yesterday.

Flashback

"_I don't CARE what you want or not, you're getting another partner."_

_"But Leader-sama-"Deidara was cut off._

_"No 'buts'! Your new partner is coming in two days, and that's FINAL!"_

_Deidara sighed an left the room._

End Flashback

"Jeez, I really am not going to like this" He complained. Then Tobi passed by.

"Hey Deidara-san, Tobi just went over to bug Hidan-senpai, but he threatened to sacrifice Tobi to the gods!" Deidara laughed, but then realized that after just a day, he had already switched the endings on their names. Deidara, being depressed as he was, walked out onto the roof with a bag of clay. The mouths in his hands fed chakra into the clay, and then he gracefully made a tan butterfly flutter over his blonde head, and then explode. "Art is a bang, yeah." He whispered to himself. He continued with several more birds, butterflies, and a squirrel until he finally felt satisfied. He looked up at the sky to notice that it was dark. He sighed, and jumped down from the roof, and landed in the grass. As he walked in through the back door, everyone seemed to be in their rooms. He looked up at the clock. It read 12:00 AM. He sighed, questioning how he was out on the roof for so long, and walked into his own room. Going to sleep seemed pretty inviting right now... "Yawn." He drifted off to sleep.

"HEY DEIDARA YOU GAY ASSHOLE!" Itachi yelled up the stairs. "LEADER-SAMA SAYS THAT HE NEEDS YOU IN HIS FRIGGING OFFICE!" Deidara got up slowly, soft blonde hair on the way down. He stepped cautiously into the leader's office, and peeked around. Oh dear god. There was a girl sitting on the edge of the desk.

"Deidara, this is Kibatsume Kagami. Your new partner." The leader said calmly. The girl looked stunning. She had smooth platinum blonde hair, sprinkled with brown highlights, and eyes that looked more like silver than gray. A single blue bead hung from her hair. He continued to examine her, and looked down. She wore a black and azure blue tight shirt, and black pants. She wore her Akatsuki robe open all the way. 'God, this chick is hot, yeah!" he thought. Despite her looks, he refused to give in to her.

"Thanks for the introduction but…. CAN I PLEASE GET CHANGED, YEAH?!" He screamed in his silk pajamas and bunny slippers. Kagami laughed hysterically.

"OMIGOD! YOU LOSER!" She laughed.

"SHUT UP! YOU IDIOT, DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM YEAH?!" Deidara screeched.

"Yeah, a loser." Deidara stomped furiously out of the room, and Kagami was still laughing.

"I like your style." The Leader said to Kagami.

"Thanks. But, dude, he had NICE hair!" She exclaimed. The leader sweat dropped, and dismissed her.

Deidara walked into his room, and looked at all his sketches. Birds, clouds, landscapes. Every thing he could. He sighed, and opened his dresser drawer. He pulled out the black Iwikagure headband, and fastened it around his head, flipping his hair over it. He skipped two more drawers, and pulled out a mesh shirt, and and Akatsuki robe. He got dressed, and lay on his bed with his sketch book. He began sketching a figure, a feminine one. He added hair, with a single piece dropping down, with a bead on it. When it was done, he looked at it, realizing it was Kagami. 'God dammit', He thought, and blew it up with his clay. Bored, he listened to the sound of the footsteps outside the door, and heard sounds that were gentle and femine. 'Kagami', he recognized, and listened as she walked into the room next to his, and dropped what sounded like heavy bags. He got up, and tip-toed out of his room, and peered into Kagami's. He gaped in amazement at what she was doing. She was pulling out a bucket of paint, and a box. She grabbed a brush out of the box, and dipped it into the bucket, and swiftly, but gracefully painted the walls. Even at the speed she was working at, it would take too long to finish in one day.

"Hey bitch!" He called, "Need some help, yeah?"

"Why you little- Wait, what?"

"Need some help?" He gestured to the paint.

"Yeah, whatever. Take a brush." He walked in, and picked up a brush, and dipped it into the bucket. He looked at it, and saw the color. Azure blue. He painted, and so did she, their art flowing over the wall. Heavy steps were heard outside the door, and a certain blue shark dude walked in.

"What 'chya doing?" He asked, staring at them curiously.

"Painting the room blue, yeah." Deidara grunted.

"OOOHH!!!! Can I help?!" Kisame asked, over-enthusiastically. Kagami said nothing, but tossed him a brush. He began to paint too. Pretty soon Itachi walked in as well. Not asking anything, he began to paint too. Next thing, almost every Akatsuki member was painting. Even Hidan took some time out of "worshipping" to his gods to help. Everyone but Zetsu and Leader was there. The reasons: 1) Zetsu would probablly be unable to because he's a plant. 2) The leader doesn't give a crap about painting. When the walls were done, everyone stared at the walls, which were now a peaceful shade of blue.

"So..um… What now?" Tobi asked.

"LETS PLAY GAMECUBE!!!!" Kisame screamed.

"Kisame. Whats wrong with you?"Itachi asked calmly.

"Nothing. I just drank nine gallons of Gatorade!"

"O.o RiGhT.." Anyway, they all left to play Pokemon Colosseum, except Deidara and Kagami. She sat down on the blue bed that must have been moved there extremely early. She grabbed a book, no a _sketchbook,_ and whipped out a pencil. She sketched swiftly, hand almost flying over the page. Deidara leaned over from where he was standing, and looked to see her drawing, a fox and a weasel, tumbling through the grass.

"Stop watching me!" She exclaimed, pulling her sketch up against her chest.

"Why, yeah?" He pestered. An anime vein popped in her forehead, and she balled her fist.

"Get. Out. Now!" She said in a calm and menacing voice. Deidara scurried out, and back to his room.

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**Yeah, I know short Chapter. Review please!  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**New chapter! Yeah! Uh huh! **

**Disclaimer: I do not, nor ever will, own Naruto. Otherwise Deidara would have more screentime.**

_**Recap: The whole Akatsuki painted the Kagami's walls. Wait a second?! You mean you don't remember??!!!**_

Deidara was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. His silky blonde hair was out of its ponytail, and spread out on the pillow, yet his bangs still covered his gyroscope eye. Suddenly, his stomach growled like a dying racoon.

"Godammit.. I don't wanna eat, yeah." Sighing, he pulled his hair up into its smooth ponytail, and straightened his robe. Just as he walked out, Kagami walked out of her own room as well.

"Oh lookie here! It's that grammatically incorrect partner of mine!" The girl teased. A major anime vein popped in his forehead.

"Are you making fun of how I talk, bitch?" he was starting to move up into her face. "Yeah." He added.

"Yep, I sure am, bastard." She replied proudly. "Now, I'm hungry, and being better than you in every way, I'm beating you to the kitchen."

"If you were smart you wouldn't do that, yeah!" Deidara warned.

"Ok, so maybe I'm not smart. Ready…." She bent forward a little. "Set….. GO!" She started sprinting, faster than any girl he had ever seen. Even so, he caught up quickly. As they ran, they were approaching Kisame, in a ripped white t-shirt, baggy jeans, sunglasses, and a bling necklace. He was carrying a radio next to his head that was playing the 'Fighting Dreamers' theme song. Pretty soon they passed him, and he was sent spinning into a wall, his boom-box twirling in the air before Kagami caught it, and began running with it. Kisame chased them, screaming for his radio.

_"We are Fighting Dreamers! Takami wo mezashite!"_

The radio played.

"GRRR!!!" Deidara was practically slamming against Kagami, trying to shove her against the wall. Smoke was literally coming off their trail, and electricity sparked between their eyes.

"You're not beating me, bastard!" She shouted.

"Ah, bring it, bitch, yeah!" Deidara shot back. Their shouting pretty much continued like that, until they landed in the door of the kitchen, screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Give. huff Me. puff MY BOOMBOX!" Kisame yelled, whacking Kagami on the head. "Grr... I need Gatorade." The fish-dude said, hugging his radio.

"DEIDARA, I WON AND YOU KNOW IT!" The platinum blonde screamed.

"NUH-UH! I DID, YEAH!"

"BE QUIET! BOTH OF YOU!" Itachi yelled, holding each of them by the collar. "Now if either of you want lunch, you're going to stop fighting and SHUT THE HELL UP!" He dropped them harshly on the floor, and walked off to have a Gatorade tea party with Kisame while playing GameCube. Deidara rubbed his neck, and his hand ended up licking him.

"Ugh." He said in disgust. Kagami rose up and slapped him on the back.

"Ah, that was a great race." She sighed happily.

"Um…. Yeah, sure." Deidara was confused. Just a minute ago she was yelling the crap outta him, and now she was being totally nice. Kagami smiled. She pulled a cup of instant ramen from her cloak and started eating.

"HEY, WHERE THE HELL DID THAT COME FROM, YEAH?!" Deidara spat, bewildered by the random cup of ramen.

"Magic!" She said sarcastically, waving her hands. Deidara growled, and then pounced on her.

"There's no such frickin' thing as magic, where the hell did you get the ramen, yeah?!"

"Actually, I have no clue!" Kagami shrugged, and sweatdropped.

"Whatever, yeah." Deidara just walked over to the fridge and ate a carrot, nibbling it.

"Hey Deidara, you look like a bunny when you do that!" She grinned.

"Ok, stop being so damn childish! Yeah!!!"

"Fine." She said reluctantly, returning to her ramen. Deidara got up and walked out of the room, tossing the rest of his carrot in the trash. _That's the last time I eat carrots._ He thought to himself. As he walked out of the kitchen, he bumped into Tobi.

"Oops, Tobi sorry!"

"Watch it baka! Yeah." As he continued walking, he passed Hidan.

"Yo." Hidan waved. Deidara looked stunned. _I really need to get out more._ He thought. He walked to his room, and started drawing.

**Yeah, I know, short chapter, but do you know how hard it is to write a Parody AND a Romance?? All in one story? Whatever. Reviews are like food for the soul. :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**New Chapter. Yeah. Hm… Special thanks to all my buddies, my sister, and the Internet. Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, but I do own Kagami.**

**Kagami: Nu-uh, I'm my own person!!**

**Me: RiGhT…….**

So Deidara pretty much lay around in his room, drawing, and being, well Deidara.

"Little childish idiot… Yeah..." Deidara muttered.

"Is Deidara-san talking about Tobi?" Tobi shouted barging in like and idiot.

"Gah! Tobi you retard! Yeah!" Deidara screamed, "No, for once I'm not insulting you Tobi, yeah!"

"Then who?" Tobi asked curiously.

"Kagami." He said rolling his eyes. Tobi tried to process this.

"Who's Kagami?"

"You mean you didn't know this entire time? Yeah?"

"Tobi is clueless."

"Okay… Tobi, you really are an idiot, aren't you? Yeah." Deidara huffed. Tobi left.

**Three Hours Later!!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHAHA!**

"Welcome to………….. Creative with cooking!" Kisame said, in an announcer type voice, wearing a black suit, and big black sunglasses. "Staaaaaaaring…. Konan!" Konan, who I'm pretty sure we all guess is a girl, was behind Kisame, wearing the white professional chef suit, and the tall white hat, with the lotus hair piece on it. Kagami and Tobi clapped and screamed, while everyone else, except Kisame and Konan, just sweat dropped.

"Hi.. Today, I'm going to cook split pea soup… made from rocks." She said. "First you umm… Take some water, put it in a bowl.. Then drop in the rocks. And you're done."

"That was Creative with Cooking!" Kisame said in his announcer voice. "Now eat or else your dead." Kisame said, in a deep murderous voice.

"No way in hell am I eating that." Itachi said in disgust.

"Did you even clean the rocks, yeah?" Deidara questioned.

"Eh heh… erm… well…." Konan muttered.

"You mean you didn't clean them?" Hidan yelled. "That should be a felony against the Jashin bible! I'm going to read the bible for several days at a time, and not come out of my room!"

"That's a little extreme, don't chya think?" Kagami asked slyly. She said so too late though, because Hidan had already stomped off to his room, locked the door, and shut the blinds.

"Tobi likes rocks!" Tobi screeched gleefully.

"Tobi, you're about as smart as a rock." Itachi said. Tobi just cocked his head dumbly. Deidara raised his fist to whack him, and almost succeeded but Pein walked in at that moment.

"Deidara, just what do you think you're doing?" Pein inquired darkly. "Tobi isn't your partner; I don't think you are justified to chastise him. Kagami snickered behind his back and Tobi ran off. "However!" He said in a higher tone, "You have every right to chastise Kibatsume-san here, and mistreat her as much as you want." Deidara grinned at this thought, and Kagami attempted to look unafraid. "Now if you will excuse me, I must clean up the mess my partner has made in the kitchen." Konan smiled weakly, and started chucking the rocks out the open window.

"This is so stupid." Kagami muttered, rolling her eyes. Deidara was lecturing her on what a true Akatsuki member was.

"A true Akatsuki ninja is serious. They have their own morals, and they know what they want to do to follow them." He was standing in front of her, telling her a long lecture. "They carry out the missions against other villages as Leader-sama instructs." Kagami raised her hand, as if she were a student in a classroom. "What?" He sighed.

"Why are we abiding by rules that some freak with a bunch of piercings tell us?" Kagami asked in that order. Before Deidara could answer she stopped him. "Didn't we join this little organization to get away from the rules of our village?" Deidara paused, pushing his hand through his hair. "You couldn't stand it could you?" Deidara closed his eyes and nodded. "I know I couldn't. I didn't join because I was evil. I joined to get rid of these stupid rules."

"I… I guess you're right." Deidara reluctantly muttered.

"I'm not really the manic brainless girl I seem like in front of everyone." She looked at him enigmatically. "You just seem to be the unlucky bastard who always is partnered with the one who wears a mask." Deidara looked at the pale haired female in front of him. A blue bead hung from her hair limply, as it forever had. Wind seemed to flow between them. "I've never been able to tell anyone that." She whispered sincerely. Kagami stood up from where she sat on the ground and moved closer to him. "You're some mystery Deidara-senpai." She spoke into his ear. Deidara was shocked. On his normally stern face was an air of surprise. As she said this, he thought. _"She doesn't realize that she's the bigger ambiguity." _He felt an odd feeling in his stomach. He doesn't remember feeling it before.

He gently removed her hand from his shoulder, and noticed how close they were. Hastily he separated, and went inside. He realized how tired he was, and turned the light off in his room and went to sleep.

**There you have it. Sorry this one wasn't as funny towards the end, but my funny writing style seems to be switching to the style I've used in other fics. Eh, oh well, I think that it works for this one. Any ways, I hope you enjoyed this installment of Art is a Bang!**


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